Why It’s Sometimes Easier to Open Up to Someone We Don’t Know - the psychology of trust

Ever found yourself spilling your heart out to a stranger?

Maybe it was someone on a plane, a late-night taxi driver, or that random person at a party you’ll never see again. Somehow, these passing connections can feel… safe.

 Recently, someone very close to me—let’s call him Rob—fell victim to an internet scam. Despite glaring red flags, Rob kept trusting the scammer. It wasn’t until $10,000 later that he finally opened up to me. But here’s what really stuck with me: even after realizing the scam, a part of him still wanted to believe the story.

Why is that?

Why do we sometimes trust strangers more than the people who truly care about us?

The Clean Slate Effect: Why Strangers Feel Safe

 Similar to what psychologists call the “Clean Slate Effect”— the idea that Cleaning one’s hands also removes residues of the past— so. strangers offer a blank canvas. With no shared history, no baggage, and no expectations, it feels easier to show parts of ourselves we often keep hidden.

Research backs this up. Harvard sociologist Mario Luis Small discovered that nearly half of people’s meaningful conversations happen not with close friends, but with casual acquaintances—sometimes even complete strangers.

Why? Because strangers don’t know your backstory. They aren’t there to judge or “fix” you. In that moment, they’re just… there. 

Think of movies like:

                  •     Before Sunrise — Jesse and Céline, two strangers, spend a single night in Vienna, sharing their deepest fears and dreams.

                  •     Lost in Translation — Bob and Charlotte find unexpected comfort in each other’s company in a foreign land.

Now think of your own life—have you ever found yourself opening up to someone you barely knew? Why did it feel easier? (tip: use these questions as a journal prompt)

When Fleeting Trust Goes Too Far

In Rob’s case, the scammer created a version of reality he wanted to believe. This isn’t uncommon. Sometimes, strangers reflect our hopes or vulnerabilities without challenging them.

 But there’s a fine line between feeling safe and being misled.

That’s why it’s powerful to seek spaces where trust is not only honored but guided—spaces that help you see yourself clearly, not just comfortably.

“Sometimes, it’s the strangers who offer the safest space for our deepest truths.”

What If You Chose to Open Up… Intentionally?

 “If you can trust a stranger on a train or a voice on the internet, imagine what’s possible when you open up to someone trained to help you truly heal.”

At Consciousness House, we create that kind of space.

                  •   An integrated, innovative approach to therapy — where psychologists, coaches, and therapists collaborate to support your unique journey.

                  •     Tailored treatment plans — blending traditional therapy with new methods to help you explore, heal, and grow.

Whether you need someone to simply listen or to gently challenge patterns that no longer serve you, our team is here.

Ready to turn fleeting trust into lasting healing?

Book your free consultation today and experience what it’s like to be truly seen—without masks, without judgment, and with a team dedicated to your growth.

Sources:

Mario Luis Small’s Research on Confiding in Acquaintances:

·      Someone To Talk To by Mario Luis Small: https://www.mariosmall.com/someone-to-talk-to

·      Harvard Magazine article discussing Small’s findings: https://www.harvardmagazine.com/2014/12/choosing-confidants

The “Clean Slate EffectStudies:

·      Nature article on hand washing and moral judgments: https://www.nature.com/articles/srep10471

·      ResearchGate publication on the psychological consequences of physical cleansing:https://www.researchgate.net/publication/254081738_Wiping_the_Slate_Clean_Psychological_Consequences_of_Physical_Cleansing